The prints of Jesus in my life

i've had a funny 2 weeks... btw i hope tt sylvester guy goes really far in singapore idol!! but then i don't have any idols. i only have a God... the ruler over my life. the lover of my soul. my savior... well i'll just start...

let's start with the first one.. well as u all noe i had this project called primer 2:body furniture where i had to design with this group of pple i din noe at first a furniture tt is useful for the body (even if u din noe now u noe).. from the beginning the idea tt was chosen was actually God-given literally... but everyone thinks i'm quite a genius.. which i am.. lol in Christ. then the woodwork was the horrid part but it still worked out... and now after my presentation tt day, ladies n gentlemen (all those reading this), my lecturer wants to send it in for a competition!! and it's a prestigious one at that... wah praise God!! i really praise God... our flesh can only take us so far... and it'll never be as far as where God can bring us in all our weakness... His strength is perfected in our weakness. well we'll see how this comes out... i really praise God... He's my wisdom, my righteousness, my sanctification.

well talking about tt, brings me onto my next thing.. another praise God situation (becos in all situations they are for the glory of God amen?).. well since the hols started i've been thinking... and far too much at that... yes i'm a thinker! i'm not some dumb bimbo k.. i like intellectual stimulating things once in awhile... and unfortunately my thinking (for those who don't, i've been thinking of life in general and everything around me... basically everything) put me in fear, and it put me under the law... which in retrospect is weird cos i was thinking of about it.. ok anyway... and i was thinking alot about my projects tt i had 2 complete and plus all the other little nitty gritty things in my life... and it became such a burden that one night i think it was monday night, i was trying to sleep and everytime i stopped thinking i realised that my eyebrows were knitted... only then i felt really burdened... and u would think i would be smart enough to tell God let Him take care of it and then stop thinking too much.. but i din... i kept trying to persuade myself and kept trying to think it thru... and i dunno why but i felt dry? like the devil was really attacking me... and i felt tt like my walk was like at a deadend... i dun even noe why... but u noe even when we feel tt way God's always there to woo us back again... first He sent my mum's fren, aunty Caroline (someone in NCC also... she's known me since i was born... been frenz wif my mum since they were teens or something.. but i'm not like tt close to her), just on tuesday. she smsed me to call her... so i did and she said as she prayed, i kept popping into her mind.. and she had a word for me from God... and at first when she read it only like half of it made sense to me... but again as i thought about what she said i felt it came at the right time... she reminded me that God deeply loved me. that i needn't fear for the future... and to rest. then she told me, " you're definitely very precious to God... you noe... ur future before you is v bright..." at that time it meant only abit to me but now i realise how much it means to me... then last nite we were having mtg n t. zu went around praying for all the youth leaders... so before he reached me i was going thru this thing n i wanted God to wow me. to make me bawl.. make me cry so i could ease the tension... then tchr zu really said what was happening to me... most of it's kinda private but i wanna share one of it tt really set me free... sometimes we feel like we're going downhill in our walk but actually we've been going uphill all along! and it's so true... when we're going through things the stress sometimes is quite unimaginable... but Jesus is there.. He wants to carry us... and take us up... nothing we do can stop our God from loving us... just now i had this tremendous sense of peace... knowing how loved i am... and i know i never want to get out of this feeling... then i had this feeling "but i will" but u noe wat?? it's not dependant on us at all! it's dependant on what Jesus did... and we can all live in this feeling... doesn't mean we won't have any more trials but we know that we can still live in this peace, in this love, in this extreme sense of being the most precious person in this world to the only person who matters the most...

i've come 2 realise tt i really can't live w/o God anymore... even if He took His eyes off me for a second just to wash His hands, i can't live... He's the air i breathe now... i don't even noe how tt happen but i just realised how stricken i would be without Him... how nothing i am without the person who loves me the most... ah... so satisfying His love is... cos He'll never leave or forsake me... neither will He u... rem it's a personal thing... :) i'm so blessed... u too... be blessed :)