Girlfriends - make or break

i was contemplating a move to multiply but after reading over my blog entries from 2004, my heart just felt like staying right here at queenofhisheart.blogspot.com :) not quite sure what i was feeling but as i read through those old entries i felt fed. i remember with fondness everyone complaining about my long entries. i've tried to create short and interesting entries like how many other millions of bloggers can do. and i've learnt something. i can't! as i read my old entries it came back to me and blessed me. so i'm sticking to it. cos this blog is for me ultimately. and i'll try to update often. sorry tho my links bar is kinda un-updated. anyone wants to do it for me? :P

well that was my introduction lol.

last week i had a school camp. my first ever! believe it anot after 2 years of being in poly. as you've read i'm involved in a school musical. it's been great so far the journey. of learning how God wants my heart and how he has been answering my prayers. many friends much favour. very blessed. also the thing about it is that because many of my new friends are non-believers it has made me realise how complacent i have been.

i've come to realise that having God is so different. as much as some of my friends are cool and all, having Jesus adds a special glitter and sparkle.

anw so i wanna talk about girlfriends. i was blessed to have a group of girlfriends who were Christians in camp with me. two of them form my little "clique - the darlings". bryna and natnat. bryna was from mgs and natnat is from NCC.

the history is that because this is a sch camp where everyone's expected to be an adult the older cast (i'm part of the newer one) slept together in the previous camp. sleeping together means guys and girls together. so i prayed and prayed that we wouldn't have to sleep together ever. and God was good. He used the authority in the form of our "musical mama" vicky to split us up. i was having a great time until the last nite...

ALL the girls moved to the guys room at 3.30 am (we were all up til 4) to sleep together. i was horrified. and not only that i basically nearly sabo-ed myself by talking too much.

the past few nights the guys had heard noises in their room (i'm sure they used this to invite the girls to their room also) and since all of them were not in the room when i was there with my two darlings and the guru (we were worshipping and singing our hearts out), i bluffed them saying i had heard the noises and they were not scary at all. and the guru played me out! he told them i hadn't heard anything. so the guys were about to hold me hostage and sleep rite there. i was like NO WAY MAN! i'm not sleeping here! never! and they offered (out of best intentions but with no thought for my modesty) to sleep next to me to protect me. and told me not to chicken out and run back to the girls room.

it's a matter of ego and integrity. if you've known me long enough u'll find that i'm one of those girls with a rare case of bloated ego. integrity was to my parents and to what i believed in strongly.

praise God without thinking anymore, my darlings and i ran back to the girls room. here's where the make or break happens.

the other group of girls we're pretty close to were like wanna go? it was really tough. sitting there and these girls pestering you to go against everything that runs in you. but not long after they left. i plonked down on my sleeping bag and my two darlings came with theirs and we layed there as i poured out my heart to them. i felt extremely comforted when they said they wanted to sleep in the girls room as well whether anot we were anti-social or chicken. and that everyone else had to respect our decision.

that night, only the 3 of us slept in the girls room. everyone else was in the boys.

i felt so grateful to God. i believe that God really protected me and kept me that night. doesn't seem to be a big deal but it's such a big deal to me. i thank God for natnat and bryna. because without them it would have been harder. God used them to help me keep intact my integrity. my accountability with my parents. i really can't say i would have been able to stand alone because i know i couldn't - if not for the grace of God in this case my two darling friends.

that night, there was shalom in each corner of the room. there was the presence of God in our room.

my God loves me very much.